3rd baby

2024.

 I have my third son. ALHAMDULLILLAH. 

2nd baby

hi. 

i pregnant with second child.

i grateful and happy.

semoga dipermudahkan perjalanan ini sepanjang mengandung .

its march

Its been a while since I have time to type in this blog. I don’t have any interesting event in life. Only my boring life and all, also a stressful work. Ha-ha

I can’t think of any creative thing to type or tell

I’m 29yo this year, what have I accomplish? 

yelle.

Only some money and a car and a house maybe?

Got married in age of 25, 

Having a kid in 27 yo.

I only typing in this blog just because i want to practice typing. Been a while since I use this laptop

haha

Only use laptop for business purpose only

I also consider buying a new laptop.

In progress saving some money.

Ok im done .

I still can type fast as flash. LOL

Haha

But my finger are little stiff.

2018 #2

hai, after a year

i'm here

trying to write

my mind is blank

nothing i can think of

of course age is just a number

but

as i am ageing, i'm being forgetful , less creative and body ache all over

not 30 yet

but  my body like i'm in my 60's

i just want to have a wonderful life

without realizing, i'm being depress

yet i'm showing a brightest smile  

i wish i can be stronger for my family

especially my beloved only son

i don't want to write a depress post

but i'm depress indeed

2018 #1

tadi makan nasi lemak ayam goreng

masa balik, 

nampak bmw x6

rasa macam love @ first sight

lalu,

gadie pun berusaha untuk jadi kaya

demi bmw impian

Jadi ibu

Alhamdulillah 22.12.2016 lahirlah seorang putera yang diberi nama Imran. bermulanya detik saya menjadi seorang ibu. aiseh. padahal ibu masih warded.

terima kasih yang tak terhingga buat suamiku. sepanjang waktu hamil dan saar berpantang sentiasa bersama. banyak pengorbanan yang syg dah buat. i love you syg.

kita dah jadi ibu dan bapa. wahh xsangka.  heheh muka baby imran mcm saya.  perangainya sbijik mcm syg. jgn imran besar nt ceramah pasal kewangan suda. pening kepala saya nanti. hehe

xda perkataan yang boleh menggambarkan perasaan saya menjadi seorang ibu. insyaAllah ada masa saya akan tulis dalam zarah yg zahir.

love both of you. syg and imran.

DEC 2016

Been a while since last I write an entry on this blog. Sangat sibuk dengan kehidupan duniawi. Demi mencari sesuap nasi. Dunia yang semakin tenat dangan keegoan manusia. Khalifah bumi yang lupa tanggungjawabnya. Haha merepek la pula. Aku just tak dapat tidur. Fikiran bercelaru. Oh. Insomnia yang berlaku bagi ibu-ibu yang bakal melahirkan anak tak lama lagi. Nervous tu perkara biasa. Hihi.

Oh baby, please la keluar cepat. Mommy cant wait to meet you. Badan aku dah sakit sangat ni, harini penat sangat kemas rumah. Sampai tidur petang tadi berliur pasal penat sangat. Lol.

Today my friend gets married. Oh so sad, xdapat nak attend kahwin dia. Sebab dia dekat sabah aku dekat sini. Naik, kapal xpasal-pasal bersalin atas awan pulak. Haha 

Huhu sekarang dah 39W 5D, due 13.12.2016. eh eh esok 11.12.2016, wah anniversary yang ke 3 tahun. Apa la laki aku neh. Tidur pulak dia. Mungkin sebab excited tunggu 13.12 sampai lupa 11.12. wakaka banyak betul tarikh nak kena ingat. Hehe.jap nak cari gambar comel2, untuk wish husband. Eh dah lewat la. Malas pulak sambung entry neh. kbai

Bajrangi Bhaijaan

Wahh. I don’t always watch Hindustan movie, but this one really make me cry a lot. Bajrangi-Bhaijaan is really a great movie! Nangis2 sampai mata bengkak. Nasib baik esok cuti. Haha. Walaupun hampir 3jam punya movie, tapi dia punya penangan memang perghhhh. Haha. Sampai sekarang masih emosi. Kalaulah filem-filem Malaysia setanding cerita Hindustan kan bagus. Ini asyik “Suamiku Ustaz, Mr. Arrogant, Suamiku Encik Sotong, Suamiku Kucing, Suamiku Kambing pelbagai lagi jenis suami dan terbaru Cinta Si Wedding Planner. Haha cerita begini semua lagho semata-mata. Buat budak-budak berangan-angan bercinta suwit-suwit gitu. Haha apa la saya ni merepek sudah. Saya bagi rate cerita ni 8.8/10.

Sekian dan terima kasih..

2016

Post pertama tahun baru. Mestikah setiap tahun baru ada azam baru. Tiap tahun saya Cuma akan renew azam.  Cuma mau kurus sikit dan berusaha berjimat cermat. Itu sahaja untuk tahun ini. 

Dan mungkin tidak keterlaluan kalau saya berhajat untuk ada baby tahun ini. 

Semoga segala dipermudahkan ya Allah. Huhu. Semoga tahun ini dikurniakan rezeki daripada Allah. insyaAllah. Semoga lebih beriman dan lebih berilmu dan lebih sabar dengan dugaan dunia.

Tahun 2016 memang sangat mencabar tertamanya rakyat malaysia, tidak lain tidak bukan pasal keadaan ekonomi sekarang. Malas cakap panjang pasal ni. Rakyat yang berilmu dan berakal tentu faham pasal keadaan negara . haha. buat apa la saya nak menyibuk hal negara, saya suma sekecil zarah jika dibandingkan dengan c Datin Ros.

Dah berumur 26 tahun ni. Im not gonna lie about my age. Dunia bilang pergi akhirat kata mari. Ajal maut ditangan tuhan. Terdetik rasa takut bila ingat pasal kematian, sudah bersediakah saya? Sudah cukupkah amalan? Bila ingat pasal cerita kematian,  bergegar seluruh badan. Ya allah ampunikah aku hambamu yang penuh khilaf.

Bebanan kerja makin berat, bebanan tanggungjawab semakin payah dan hampir tak tertanggung. Semoga diriku kuat dan tabah ya allah. Teringat masa belasan tahun, segalanya ringan. Bila melihat yang lain masih bersuka-ria sebenarnya dalam hati, teringin tapi tanggungjawab mengawal semuanya.Semoga kuat  ya Allah.

Setengah jam lagi jam10. Masa untuk tidur dan rehatkan fizikal dan rohani. Good night kind world.

Who knew

Who knew

That i would've loved you

Who knew, 

That i would've thinking about you all the time

Who knew, 

I would've need you soo much

I never thought you would meant soo much to me.

I love you

Andai tiada tempat mengadu

Seringkali aku bertanya kenapa harus begini
Penyesalan
Tetapi, jika ini ketentuan Allah, aku terpaksa redha dalam kesakitan
Seringkali aku menangis
Berdoa pada Allah 
Meminta petunjuk Allah
Minta untuk diberikan kesabaran

Aku lemah
Ikutkan perasaan 
Aku tentu lemas dalam lautan air mata.

Wahai tuhan yang maha mendengar
Berikan aku kekuatan
Aminn..

MALAM YANG SUNYI

Memandangkan dah lama tak menaip. So malam ni sayan akan berusaha untuk merepek bersunguh-sungguh. Cuma tak tahu apa yang petut dimerepekkan. Ahaa. Apa kaa. Sot suda. Cuti 2 bulan ni buat otak kurang berfungsi dengan betul. Xda peningkatan diri cuma berat makin meningkat menikut carta lemak secara jayanya. Haha. Kadang saya merasa i should go. But i don’t know where. Dengan malaysia yang huru-hara [-“SYUKURLAH MALAYSIA MASIH AMAN-. Barang makin mahal duit makin kecik. Huu. Nampak barang hati gatal nak beli. Last-last terpaksa lupakan niat. Ngeh. Xpa la. Biar susah sekrang jangan susah nanti. Xda duit sebab memuaskan nafsu shopping. Haha. Kan bagus kalau ada orang yang bijak pandai dan berani menggulingkan kerajaan semasa. Tp pihak lain pn lebih kurang. Bukan pemerintahan telus. Ah malas la cakpa pasal ni. Xpasal-pasal saya pullak gila.. Heheg 

This world is in chaos

War has begun

This world has come to the end.

Are we ready or are we not?

We saw them on news.

Being emo is not helping at all

Updating fb status not making world any better

Saying that you want to fight with them there?

I say ' we are not strong as they are'

Our strength our imaan has big differences just like

Between the sky and the earth

I've been ask my friend

Are you dare

Are you willing to fight a war like that

Some say yes

Some say no

Same say don't know

I would say " i would like to, but am i strong enough"

I only can pray for them,

But if i can go there, i wouldn't hesitate to go

I really want them to feel that we are with them

At least im with them

It is so heartbroken seeing them suffering

Maybe they just suffering physically

Maybe they happy in the inside

Losing friend and family like that

Im not strong enough to face something like that

I just can pray.

a song dedicated to you

Do i have any song? 

If so what song it will be. Haha.

I really love sad love song. Don't know why. But i just do. Im not a good singer. But I think I can sing! Haha. Now I’ve the app called "smule" i always karaoke-ing with smule. Haha nobody know me. Who care if I sound horrible. Ngerr. Hahaha

I sometime write a poem. And i sing my own poem. I don’t now why im getting depressed or cry when sing it. Haha

If I have the talent in music’, im sure there’s a lot song i will write. Huhu. Hurmm Actually the title of this entry is a song dedicated to you.  Ahah I just now listening to the top10 song that will make you cry anda the top 10 breakup song. Haha. And it’s inspired me to write a poem. Huhu. 

I want to sing it. But i just  not a good singer. Hihi

I currently listening to gamma song- hidup segan mati tak mahu. The song tiitle a but harsh. Haha. But this the only song crossed my mid. K bai. Its already late.

Sorry

Im sorry.

For what?

For loving you too much

For missing you

Im sorry for wanting to see you everyday

For always thinking about you before sleep

For feeling upset if i didn't get to seee you

For wanting be by your side

For wanting you to be happy

For wanting you to be part of my life

For trying to make you smile

Im sorry for bothering you

For dreaming about you everyday

Im sorry for replying back as quickly as possible

Im sorry for being mad, jelaous and sad

Im sorry for thinking that you loved me

For annoying you with my msj and call

Im sorry for caring about you

Im just

Sorry for every single mistake i made

Good bye

-copy paste fb- 

Kbai.

Al-Fatihah

29 march 2015 saya dikejutkan dengan berita pemergian ibu mentua saya. meskipun cuma kenal dalam kurang dari 3 bulan. namun kehilangan tetap dirasai.

saya masih ingat ketika pertama kali saya call mak. berdebar juga hari. tapi tetap saya gagahkan untuk mendail. 

tapi bila dah cakap dengan mak, rasa macam dah lama kenal. arwah mak seorang yang baik dan peramah.  ingat lagi mak ucap terima kasih sebab call dia. 

masa bertunang dulu itulah pertama dan terakhir jumpa mak. hati nak sangat p KL jumpa mak masa dia sakit, tapi apakan daya. keadaan saya masa itu tak mengizinkan. sedih sangat sebab tak sempat nak berbakti, xsempat nak rasa ada dua mak. mak dah pergi dahulu.

semoga roh mak mentua saya ditempatkan dikalangan orang-orang yang beriman. amin insyaAllah.

Dream wedding

Every girl have their own wedding dream

Me too

But seems that dream has faded away

I don't know what i want 

I can't imagine how that wedding would be now

Hmm just because

I don't know

Broken

This should be my happy day

But instead im alone and crying

Im broken into pieces

This heartache almost kill me

Just let the tear heal my heart

December Rain

You keep running from the truth, you know it's true
you think I am crazy for loving you 

I wish you could see the angel I see 
when you stand in front of me

you think I am your best gift of all
but I wish you could understand, without you I stand 10 in. tall

I never believed in the saying "opposites attract"
but the second I met you it became a proven fact

I am cold as ice, while you're hot as fire
as long as I live you're my one and only desire

you're not just my want but also my need
you're like my personal drug, for you I plead

I am the happiest person whenever you're near
but the second you leave I shed a lonely tear

***************************

Ahayy apa la malam ni datang sot. Lama nya tak bising dalam belog neh. Busy layan anime la katakan. Just finished sailormoon. Binggung jap napa dalam anime xda scene sailormoon jadi sailorcosmos. That one scene that i really looking foward. Huhu sad.  Xda pla. But dalam komik ada pla. I read their manga last updated 2010. Urghh. New episodes! I will make sure i will find the latedt update of sailormoon. Meanwhile i will watch chinese drama " condor hero" . haha i really love this drama. Still remember the drama on TV2 @ 7pm. My father will switch off the TV. So sad oo. Because we had to study. T.T. haha paling happy kalau bapa sy p masjid sampai jam9. Boleh tgk drama china tuhh. Eh eh dah lewat. Why am i not sleeping? Sebab nak tunggu c bucuk siap kerja. He must call me! If not saya akan merajuk sampai tua. Huhu. Haha. Ee craving for cake la pulak. Alamak. Macamna la nak kurus kalau kepala asyik fikirkan pasal makanan aja. Hehe. Azam tahun baru. Saya mau kurus dan cantik. Maybe renew azam ja la. Haha. And next year insyaAllah will proceed to the next level of life. Upgrade macam2. Bukan COC ja yg kena upgrade, hidup pun kena upgrade juga tau. Ahah. Oh my. Game COC sy  biar la sampai TH7 dlu. Max lvl semua then sy upgrade p TH8. Erk. Apa yg saya mengarut neh. Okay la. Hihi. Babai blogie. :)

Again.

Again 

I just cannot sleep through my dissapointed of my life

You not being supported when you are in pain

Painful feeling throbbing deep into your chest

Again 

What is the most disappointment you have in your life?

Not having you dream come true 

Or

Achieving one dream to let go yours another?

Again

Or just simply hanging off the phone 

And not being calling back?

Again? 

Maybe you just can't sleep.

First time

3.23 am

I'm still wide awake

Laying down with nothing to do

I watched anime just now

Hey! The next thing i know is i'm crying

Soo touched by that anime

And then,

I remember how i used to feel when i cannot sleep at time like this

I would feel soo lonely

Thinking of you

I recalling those wonderful feeling

Texting you in the middle of the night just to ask " are you okay?"

Never tired of texting good morning, sweet dream

Because i loved you very much

Eh!

Did you know i had a huge crush on you?

It wouldn't called crush if it didn't hurt

I rather being hurt for loving you

I missed we talk about feeling at this late night

I missed all those first time

I missed all of you

I cannot do anything without you here

I always need you by my side

Sometime i just looked at the old picture

Reading some old conversation

I missed that

I feel lonely, even you are now half mine

I am afraid i would feel lonely even after you are mine

I don't want you to forget all those first time feeling

I have a jar full of wishes and paper crumbled

All those first time 

I remember it well

Aren't you?

If i can travel through time 

I would tell you, 

Please don't forget me

You never know how much you meant to me

I was afraid being left alone when you are the only one i can hold on to

I really afraid of losing you

I cannot afford how much pain i have to endure because of losing you

Just, please

Don't let be all by my side, Alone

I need you my dear

I Love you soo much